Feeling frustrated with myself

I get frustrated with my lack of skills.  I know I am developing new skills as part of my MA, but I repeatedly do not grasp the level of skills needed in order to do things well, soon enough.

It was suggested to me that I needed a website to publicise my work several months ago.  I dismissed this as "I'm not going to need one".  Since then I have decided I am not going to be a commercial artist (so I don't need a website), I don't have a big ego and thus need to publicise my work (so I don't need a website), actually I talk better than I make (so I don't need a website) ….. but I think I might enter my work in competitions that fit my practice….. so I need one ….. now!

Gareth, a class colleague, showed me how to set up a simple website, and did the first actions for me.  Since then I have been on holiday for a week, and having returned, tried to edit the basic website.  I struggled so much.  None of my work is to a high enough standard.  My photos are poorly taken - wonky, badly staged, etc.  I just don't have an eye for detail.  I can't remember what Gareth showed me to set up the website.  And once I photograph my stitch work, when magnified, I can see all the details that are not quite perfect, that you don't see with normal eyesight.

Mrs Konieczny's crossword

Vanda sent me a competition entry for ALL, Art Language Location, a Cambridge based event requesting artworks to fit artist-selected locations for an art trail.  The theme is text. Closing date yesterday. My work fits perfectly, and the application form requests a website.  I just cannot get it set up in time.  I forced myself to submit an application, but I have to admit it is a poor attempt.  As a shortlister with a lot of experience, I would not shortlist it.

I have read articles about the poor applications that get submitted, and feel inadequate because I have fallen into most of the traps discussed.  But on my side, I have to say, some of the application forms are quite poor too.  Yesterday's form requested attachments, but the attachment symbol did not work.  It requested an artist statement, but no box to insert it.  The work description was limited to 200 characters.  Up to 6 photos were required, but work was not expected to be complete, or even started.

But most of all, if I had set up the website already, my problems would not have existed.

And since then, I have been looking critically at other people's websites, realising how much work goes into getting them set up, and the amount of professionalism that it takes to get things looking right.  As usual, it is not until I try to do it myself, that I have any idea how much skill it takes.