Peaking and Troughing

Jim and I went to Sissinghurst today.  It was wonderful.  Lovely gardens themed by colour.  I had never understood the concept of the White Border ... until I saw it!  Hugely varied foliage, soft, wispy, jagged, serrated, pinlike.  And the purple border was wonderful too.  We went to Sissinghurst on a Tuesday, hoping the traffic would be light (it was) and crowds would be minimal (busy but not crowded).  It started to drizzle in the afternoon, but we had done our tour, and I had taken many photos.

Now for the white flowers

Then I had a conversation with a fellow student, which left me demoralised again.  I was explaining how I had found the feedback difficult and was none the wiser, and this person said my work had not progressed beyond stitch panels and maybe the assessors thought my work was not developing.  Which may well be true.  But I don't want the work to develop.  I want the thinking to develop.  In a series of work.  I am really not sure my decision to continue the course is a quality decision.  

Thinking about the presentation we have to to later this term, about what we are doing, how we are doing it, and why we are doing it, makes me come back to why I am stitching.  I do it to facilitate my thinking.  I am not aiming to exhibit (don't need other people liking my work) and I'm certainly not aiming to sell (don't want to dance to anyone else's tune, and don't need the money).  It's not about anyone other than me.  

I feel very demotivated.